I can't believe it. It's already mid October of 2014. 10 more weeks until your second birthday and the year 2015, which is year I have looked forward to since I made the decision shortly after your birth to leave you with your grandmother, my mother.
You are now 21 months. You are definitely your own person. You have your own personality. You make it known what you like and what you don't like. You definitely don't like strangers. You love ice cream. And even if I only see you on the weekends (not counting Skype), you definitely know I'm your mom. You say "umma" and my heart breaks into a ten billion little pieces. It explodes with such pride, joy, and love.
But because you've gotten so smart. You broke our deal. Remember in one of my old entries when I told you that it felt like we were always going on a first date.? Every weekend, I would have to convince that I'm your mom, you'd eventually believe me and come Sunday, we'd part ways. This was on repeat for perhaps the first 18 months of your life but now it seems like you really know who I am. You cry and scream out "umma" every time I leave. There are times I can't stand it and would rather wait for you to fall asleep than leave Irvine. I spend majority of time on the drive back to San Diego holding back tears and sometimes I just can't. I try to stay strong to not upset you or grandma. I put on a brave face, kiss you, hug you and just tell you how much I love you and I hope and pray that's enough. I know you're too young understand why somebody who's suppose to be your mom only sees you so intermittently.
So here we are..its been about 600 days since my maternity leave ended. When you were about 6 months old and 4 months into this back and forth relationship, I realized we had 100 weeks left until mommy took boards and I would bring you down to San Diego permanently. We are in week 67. 33 more weeks. It was suppose to be 33 more first dates but it looks like you've realized that's not what it is and it's actually 33 more weeks of our long distance relationship. During my drive last night, I thought about this and felt compelled to blog to you.
But I don't want to make this a sad post. So I thought since we're on the topic of first dates, here's the story your dad wrote about how he met me. He wrote this for our wedding website and he doesn't like to write so I treasure it quite a bit. So let's move away from the sadness and focus on moving forward. But every once in awhile, we got to visit to the past. So here it is.
"It was just a routine day as Chuck stepped out of the hospital and walked towards the Bachman parking lot. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw a beautiful girl on the opposite side of the street. Chuck took a second look without the girl noticing and quickly entered the parking structure. For some reason, the image of that girl never left Chuck’s mind. Chuck thought it was silly and nothing better to take the stress away than a heavy workout. Little did Chuck know, that girl would appear on the Stairmaster across the room facing the bench press. So, to create a chance for conversation, Chuck worked out for an extra hour in hopes of running into her in the free weights section of the gym. It was Chuck’s lucky day, the girl got off the Stairmaster and headed toward the triceps machine. “Hey, didn’t I see you at the hospital earlier? I’m Chuck, one of the surgical interns.” The girl looked surprised and replied, “maybe, my name’s Geri, a 3rd year med student.” The rest of the conversation revolved around her horrific experience with a medicine resident. Chuck offered his number with the excuse of “call if you have any questions about clerkship,” an excuse in retrospect sounded extremely lame since what can a surgical intern offer in terms of help about a curriculum that he never experienced? To Chuck’s pleasant surprise he received a text that read “I think I’ll take you up on your offer :)” The first date seemed like a blur to Chuck because something about Geri made him lose track of time. Chuck knew this girl was different but he still had no idea of what’s to come. Almost immediately, Chuck and Geri became inseparable and to Chuck, Geri’s the best thing that’s ever happened to him. The rest of the story is history…"
So there it is. and here's something else I want to add. After 6 months of dating and pretending to be cool that there was not yet the "girlfriend" label, on October 11th 2010, exactly 4 years and 9 days ago, your father finally asked me to be his girlfriend. If I only I knew then that he would propose in no less than 5 months later and then we'd be married 3 moths after that. That was our whirlwind romance where when you know you just know. So today, I thought I would also share some pictures of your mom and dad--pre you and earlier into our training, in case you wonder why we look so much younger.
Our first Photo Booth photo. We became "official" boyfriend girlfriend later this day.
One of our date nights.
no real significance to these photos. just your daddy being silly.
The proposal 03-13-11 (4 days before Match day!)
Match day 2011
Our engagement photos
Engagement photos part 2 fob style
Rehearsal dinner 06-17-11
Our wedding 06-18-11
So what do you think? Your mommy and daddy were once young and just a couple kids who fell in love.